The pirate replies, "Arrrgh! That's a fine story... we was caught in a monster storm off the cape and a giant wave swept me overboard. Just as they were pullin' me out a school of sharks appeared and one of 'em bit me leg off, but he was sorry!" he said pulling open his jacket to reveal a sharkskin vest.
"Blimey!" said the seaman. "What about the hook"?
"Ahhhh...", mused the pirate rising up in his chair to play out the action; "We was boardin' a trader ship, pistols blastin' and swords swingin' this way and that. In the fracas me hand got chopped off, but they were sorry!" He reveals he's wearing over a dozen pendants on his necklace, each taken from sailors he'd slain.
"Zounds!" remarked the seaman. "And how came ye by the eye patch"?
"A seagull droppin' fell into me eye", answered the pirate plainly, taking another drink and just staring straigth back at the sailor.
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?!?" the sailor asked incredulously.
"Well..." said the pirate lifting his sharp, polished hook into a dazzling beam of sunlight , "... it was me first day with the hook."
- As told by firstname.lastname@example.org